Bucket Fillers and Spillers

 By Andrea Merrell

Some friendships don’t last for long,
    but there is one loving friend who is joined to your heart
    closer than any other!

Proverbs 18:24 TPT

 

The friendship was unhealthy. Almost toxic. Even though it happened over thirty years ago, I still remember how our time together drained the life out of me.

Having friends is important, but we need to choose those relationships carefully. If not, we might inadvertently invest too much time and energy into relationships that are not good for our wellbeing.

According to Renew magazine, relationships can easily fall into one of two categories: bucket fillers or bucket spillers.

Bucket fillers are connections we have with friends and family that make us feel loved, encouraged, appreciated, and fulfilled. Bucket spillers are connections that can make us feel unloved, depleted, anxious, and undervalued.

As we get older, we need to give ourselves permission to weed out relationships that don’t enrich our lives. And there’s nothing selfish about doing so. It’s a self-protective measure to keep us from becoming emotionally and mentally drained.

But no matter how good our earthly relationships are, the best way to keep our buckets filled is to spend time with the One who knows us best and loves us most. He will never judge us, betray us, or leave us. He’s the loving friend who is joined to your heart, closer than any other.

(Photo courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net and Aleks Melnik.)

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Are your relationships bucket fillers or bucket spillers? via @AndreaMerrell (Click to tweet.)

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Choose Your Friends Carefully and Prayerfully

By Andrea Merrell

There are “friends” who destroy each other,

    but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 18:24 NLT

 

The relationship was toxic. I knew it deep inside but didn’t know what to do. I loved my friend, but she was manipulative and deceitful. Our time together drained me every single time, leaving me emotionally spent. I needed the courage to walk away. Fortunately, by God’s grace, I moved to another state and that was, as they say, that.

God wants us to have healthy relationships. He sends people into our lives who will support and encourage us. Pray for us. Bring out the best in us. People who sincerely care and will be there for us no matter what. People who add value to our lives. Sometimes these relationships are only for a season. But sometimes they are forever.

When it comes to friendships, pastor and author Bob Gass gives us the perfect prayer:

Lord, I need your wisdom to recognize the friends and associates I should choose. Help me to steer clear of the relationships that lead me away from the path you’ve laid out for me. Send people into my life who are godly and wise and will help us both to bless, encourage, and contribute to the quality of each other’s lives. Show me the friendships that are worth fighting for, and I’ll gladly do it. Be Lord of all my relationships so they will be what you want them to be.

Honor the healthy relationships in your life. Thank God for them. Pray for them. Be that friend who sticks closer than a brother.

(Photo courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net and Stuart Miles.)

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Honor the healthy relationships in your life.Thank God for them. Pray for them. Be that friend who sticks closer than a brother. via @AndreaMerrell (Click to tweet.)

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